Touchdown!

Next Sunday I will be having my parents over for football and food. It will be my mother’s birthday and what better way to celebrate than with food? However due to the lack of metabolism me and my parents are challenged with, it’s a must that the food consumed be healthy. Not just a nod to healthy with crudités and ranch dressing, actually healthy. So to plan my menu I spent Thursday night poring over Bon Appétit magazines. This yielded nothing healthy but did give me ideas for holiday meals.

I took my search to the internet where most research is now conducted by people. I sought for football food, game day treats that didn’t involve queso, fried yummies or anything with the term ‘bbq’ in it. I got nowhere fast. Then I found www.lowsodiumcooking.com. Sloppy Joes! I found a recipe with 105mg of salt. Score! Manwich has 2,400mg, the FDA recommended daily allowance. What else did I find there? Some interesting numbers:

• Most Americans not watching their sodium consume 7000-8000 mg daily
• People who avoid adding salt at the table may still consume 3000-4000 mg daily
• Many experts recommend less than 1500 mg daily for people with a history of heart trouble, high blood pressure or other risk factors for heart disease

Ponder for a moment what all those numbers mean to the average football viewer: nothing. We eat nachos, pizza, wings, burgers and many other treats, washing it all down with beer or pop and our only concern is the number on the scoreboard. I can relate! In past years I was a regular at Dos Gringos during football season, where the waitress knew to bring me an order of nachos and a pitcher of Diet Pepsi with lemon wedges. No, the Diet Pepsi didn’t balance out all the fat and salt I was eating, I just prefer the flavor over regular Pepsi. Back to my story. This was a weekly occurrence for me for the duration of the regular season and would flow into playoff; sometimes the occasional college football game too. Last year, a mere two months after beginning my eating plan, I set foot in Dos Gringos and stunned the wait staff by saying I was just there for unsweetened iced tea and to watch the game. She wasn’t too thrilled I wasn’t spending nearly as much money and I learned that people who work for tips don’t like those who essentially loiter.

After that I didn’t go back, I stayed home with a pitcher of Crystal Lite and my couch. My usual waitress wasn’t too thrilled I wasn’t spending nearly as much money and I learned that people who work for tips don’t like those who essentially loiter.

After that I didn’t go back, I stayed home (as I will this NFL season now that there is one) with a pitcher of Crystal Lite and my couch. I’d watched athletic supporters at the restaurant cramming in food like they’d just arrived from Ethiopia. I’m curious if they even enjoyed it.

 Tonight’s lie: there’s no joy in watching football if there’s no greasy food to go along with it.